Effing Toast!

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roobee
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Re: Effing Toast!

Post by roobee » Fri Jun 20, 2008 12:58

schlump wrote:margerined
see, this is where you've got it all wrong. margearine on toast is the food of the devil. it's got to be butter, and knibbles is dead right when it comes to toast temperature - it should be cooled to crisp so the butter doesn't get all greasy.

best thing is when you butter a slice of cooled toast, add a little peanut butter THEN add some more butter on top so you leave teeth marks. toast heaven.

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jayen_aitch
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Re: Effing Toast!

Post by jayen_aitch » Fri Jun 20, 2008 12:59

your poor heart.

next you'll want to batter the whole thing.

roobee
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Re: Effing Toast!

Post by roobee » Fri Jun 20, 2008 12:59

don't think i haven't tried.

linus

Re: Effing Toast!

Post by linus » Fri Jun 20, 2008 13:01

schlump wrote:i'm not really so interested if there's a big crunch sound. it's about chewiness.
then you don't need toast, you need a pack of gum... chum

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jayen_aitch
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Re: Effing Toast!

Post by jayen_aitch » Fri Jun 20, 2008 13:01

When in Glasgow... batter everything.

miss deepfreeze
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Re: Effing Toast!

Post by miss deepfreeze » Fri Jun 20, 2008 13:05

jayen_aitch wrote:When in Glasgow... batter everything.
come now jonny, we didn't batter you when we here, did we? although with that kind of talk, maybe we should have.

linus

Re: Effing Toast!

Post by linus » Fri Jun 20, 2008 13:05

knibbles wrote:I bet you've got a right greasy elbow.
and a left one

ha ha, boom boom

why do you fear a greasy elbow, knibbles?

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schlump
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Re: Effing Toast!

Post by schlump » Fri Jun 20, 2008 13:08

uhh. butter just offends me. i find it pretty degrading not being strong enough to spread something which actually says spreadable on the packet. i don't want to gore big wounds into my toast. i actually get some kind of freaky vegan margarine, but that's a whole other thing.

i think if everyone on anorak had breakfast it would end in homicide.

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jayen_aitch
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Re: Effing Toast!

Post by jayen_aitch » Fri Jun 20, 2008 13:14

miss deepfreeze wrote:although with that kind of talk, maybe we should have.
No, I love Glasgow and all who sail in her.

I was very well looked after there. I always have a lovely time and lots of delicious food there.
Last edited by jayen_aitch on Fri Jun 20, 2008 13:16, edited 1 time in total.

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annie
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Re: Effing Toast!

Post by annie » Fri Jun 20, 2008 13:15

schlump wrote:uhh. butter just offends me.
you know how last week andy and i said you could stay over at ours if you needed a place to sleep? i take it all back. we are a 100% margerine-hating household (see? i even refuse to spell it properly), and i'm keeping it that way. margerine. is. disgusting.
i think if everyone on anorak had breakfast it would end in homicide.
indeed.

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Jeezy Creezy
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Re: Effing Toast!

Post by Jeezy Creezy » Fri Jun 20, 2008 13:24

When I moved into a cheapo bedsit in St Helier I subsisted on packets of mini melba toast that you could buy from the pound shop andnot-dairylea soft cheese wedges. I used to sit on the floor in the half-light of the plug-in heater (glorified light bulb really) and spread god-knows-what-it-was-made-of-really on slice of after mini-slice of melba toast. I fear that if had intaken anything with a water content higher than gravy I would have been in danger of rupturing my internal digestive system.
Sarcasm was the lowest form of wit. Now there's you.

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schlump
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Re: Effing Toast!

Post by schlump » Fri Jun 20, 2008 13:33

you know how last week andy and i said you could stay over at ours if you needed a place to sleep? i take it all back. we are a 100% margerine-hating household (see? i even refuse to spell it properly), and i'm keeping it that way. margerine. is. disgusting.
ha ha. you know the guy in of mice and men?, curly, maybe?, who walks around wearing a glove fulla vaseline, to keep his hand soft? i wear a glove full of margarine. i pick up my toast with my unsheathed freaky yellow margarine hand and eat. is no-one with me on this?, butter being kind of lame?, margarine being nicer and softer and less prone to clumping and stuff?

the other thing about eating toast in this house that i'm staying was opening the tub of butter and seeing that it had no crumbs in it. pretty daunting. it's like trying to colour within the lines.

i feel like such an under-toasting butter-eschewing breakfast renegade in this thread. maybe i should take a band of outlaws on the run, and lightly toast pieces of bread above a fire under a railway arch.

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Jeezy Creezy
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Re: Effing Toast!

Post by Jeezy Creezy » Fri Jun 20, 2008 14:01

I'm with you onthe lightly toasting but aginast you with the margarining. Margarine is for baking only and has no place in this thread. And as for burnt toast, my dislike for it nears the level of phobia.

Butter the lightly toasted bread. Allow to melt. Butter again on now to get a uniform thick spread of butter.
Sarcasm was the lowest form of wit. Now there's you.

SophieC
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Re: Effing Toast!

Post by SophieC » Fri Jun 20, 2008 14:12

annie wrote:
i don't own a toaster. i remember jamie staying over once, and being outraged at the lack toaster and sliced bread in the morning. i felt like the worst host ever. i shouldn't be allowed to post on this thread, should i? it's making me want to buy one though.
you're odd fish annie. not only do you get excited about receiving a CD of bulgarian choir music from your boyfriend (i'd be livid), you also have no toaster. i have no recollection of slagging off your (non) toastal service but i think you probably deserved it. the fact you have not remedied the situation i choose to interpret as a provocation and a deliberate assault on my character.

you bitch.
When the people are being beaten with a stick, they are not much happier if it is called 'the People's Stick.'

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humblebee
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Re: Effing Toast!

Post by humblebee » Fri Jun 20, 2008 14:22

There is a school of thought that toast done in a toaster is fundamentally not right, and only the grill produces proper toast. Probably the toaster is too quick or something. I dunno what I think about this. I can see it, but the trouble with the grill is you have to pre-heat it. Unless you want toast with the texture of Ryvita, cos if you leave the toast in the grill for ages while it warms up, it makes it horribly dry and over-crunchy. Actually, though, reading through what some of you massive freaks have posted here, you probably do want toast with the texture of Ryvita. You massive freaks.

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janglyjan
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Re: Effing Toast!

Post by janglyjan » Fri Jun 20, 2008 14:44

I just had toast with black olive spread for lunch. It was lovely.

What about the ends of bread? I don't like the end slices and usually give them to the birds. However, I'm at a certain level of poverty at the moment that I made myself eat the end just now. And it was actually better than I feared. It was this grainy bread I got from Aldi, it was pretty good.

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obo-bobolina
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Re: Effing Toast!

Post by obo-bobolina » Fri Jun 20, 2008 14:53

The ends make the best toast I reckon. Nom nom. And I do think that toast made under the grill is the best. Especially really thickly cut slabs of two day old bread. Real bread. that is Not sliced loaf.

Of course I regularly settle for sliced loaf done in the toaster because it is quicker and doesn't require me to keep watch to prevent inappropriate buringing issues. I kike my toast well done, but certainly not charred.

I will not abide margarine though. Got to be butter. I'm a lurpak girl, myself. Lurpak and a dollop of either little scarlett strawberry or rhubarb and ginger jam. Lovely.
Give over.

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Jeezy Creezy
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Re: Effing Toast!

Post by Jeezy Creezy » Fri Jun 20, 2008 15:27

janglyjan wrote:I just had toast with black olive spread for lunch. It was lovely.
Oh is that the stuff that comes in a squirty metal tube? I've tried the green olive version and it's gorgeous.
Sarcasm was the lowest form of wit. Now there's you.

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janglyjan
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Re: Effing Toast!

Post by janglyjan » Fri Jun 20, 2008 15:37

Jeezy Creezy wrote:
janglyjan wrote:I just had toast with black olive spread for lunch. It was lovely.
Oh is that the stuff that comes in a squirty metal tube? I've tried the green olive version and it's gorgeous.
Mine came in a little jar but, yup, that's the stuff, comes in tubes as well. Yummy.

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annie
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Re: Effing Toast!

Post by annie » Fri Jun 20, 2008 16:04

JamieC wrote:the fact you have not remedied the situation i choose to interpret as a provocation and a deliberate assault on my character.
next time you come over i'll make sure i have a broken toaster, just to get your hopes up and then deprive you of morning toast yet again.

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