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Re: Flares?

Posted: Wed May 21, 2008 08:52
by jayen_aitch
humblebee wrote:A first-time flares user should never exceed the 22-inch flare.
I agree.

I'd suggest that starting on bootcut trousers and working your way up through 22-inch before trying anything larger is sensible.

In many ways they are the gateway trouser you need before moving on to class B or A flares.

Re: Flares?

Posted: Wed May 21, 2008 10:29
by Life on Deck
I think the reason flares don't work is that if you turn them upside down (i.e. wear the bottoms at the waist) then you end up looking like Donald Duck, or worse still, you look like a human ball in a cup.

It's a sartorial bad dream!

Re: Flares?

Posted: Wed May 21, 2008 10:31
by jayen_aitch
You're over-thinking things... why would you turn them upside down?

Re: Flares?

Posted: Wed May 21, 2008 10:34
by Life on Deck
jayen_aitch wrote:You're over-thinking things... why would you turn them upside down?
Well, that kiddy band Kriss Kross wore their trousers back to front, so why not wear them upside down as well? I think my potted logic pitted me against the fact that if you wore a normal pair of jeans upside down at the waist then you wouldn't look like a human bouquet of flowers.

I really want to try this now. Jonte, can I borrow a pair in a month?

Re: Flares?

Posted: Wed May 21, 2008 10:50
by jayen_aitch
To wear upside down?

You could maybe get a person in each leg, but I think it would end badly.

Re: Flares?

Posted: Wed May 21, 2008 11:13
by meepmeep
Flares are just wrong. Drain-pipe style trousers, that's where it's at (if you necessarily have to wear trousers - I prefer a skirt).

One simple reason (amongst others) why flares are wrong: my dad wore flares in the groovy 1960's and 70's and I thought one was supposed to try and avoid to end up like their parents! And I bet lots of other dads (and mums) also wore flares. If I wore flares (and was a grumpy dentist) I would be exactly like my dad, and that's something I've been trying so hard to avoid. No flares, no flares!

On a slightly different note; I once wanted to try my dad's old flares on, just for the fun of it. And they were so tight that I broke them, they just cracked. So that's the story of when I ruined a pair of brown suede flares. And that explains something that is very wrong with flares: the dimensions! All the fabric is around the lower part of the legs, when it should be around the bum!

Re: Flares?

Posted: Wed May 21, 2008 11:34
by Life on Deck
jayen_aitch wrote:To wear upside down?

You could maybe get a person in each leg, but I think it would end badly.
We'd end up looking like this pair of dafties (minus Baldrick):
Blackadder Flares.png
Blackadder Flares.png (245.67 KiB) Viewed 7884 times
See you on Sveavägen for some Saturday Nite fevering. Or a mild sweat.

Re: Flares?

Posted: Wed May 21, 2008 11:37
by Life on Deck
meepmeep wrote:All the fabric is around the lower part of the legs, when it should be around the bum!
I would imagine that it gives you awful SBS, doesn't it?

Re: Flares?

Posted: Wed May 21, 2008 11:45
by meepmeep
Aggi on the Mezzanine wrote:
meepmeep wrote:All the fabric is around the lower part of the legs, when it should be around the bum!
I would imagine that it gives you awful SBS, doesn't it?
You vile vile person! That's disgusting! I know nothing of this SBS* thing you've just mentioned - I'm a girl!



* I've just understood that SBS is an abbreviation for Sweaty Balls Syndrome. Eugh!

Re: Flares?

Posted: Wed May 21, 2008 11:49
by jayen_aitch
There are some alarming errors in logic in this thread, which I shall do my best to correct... trousers aren't made with a finite amount of material.

Just because the legs become voluminous around the knee, does not mean there will be a lack of material to ensure comfort around the nether-regions.

Flares - you'll be pleasantly surprised.

Re: Flares?

Posted: Wed May 21, 2008 11:55
by Life on Deck
I once wore a pair of flares for a lark, and the cut of the thread wasn't very pleasing to the crotch region. The trousers were the right size and were tried on in a old tat shop years ago. So these trousers were possibly a hark back to when they were at their peak in the seventies.

How the sod did Mud do that Tiger Feet dance should never be questioned let alone answered. Unless the whole shebang was owing to the tightness of their pantaloons.

Are you the same size as me in waist, jonny? I have a curious itch to disprove the theory that flares are all correct in material.

Re: Flares?

Posted: Wed May 21, 2008 12:33
by jayen_aitch
Probably about the same... Once you've tried them, you may never go back.

Re: Flares?

Posted: Wed May 21, 2008 17:07
by grumpytimes
hmmm, so people think you can alwatys spot a first time flare wearer. see the bootcut trousers idea is good, but the problem with bootcut trousers as i see it is they're not flares.

also re the dad thing, there's no photo evidence of my dad between childhood and parenthood so i never have old photos to haunt me. i think he lived up to the old saying "if you don't remember the 60s you were probably in your room studying for accounting exams".

also do you have to accept that you're going to have to look retro? or is it possible to wear flares and look like you're not really fussed about Big Star (for the record I am VERY fussed about Big Star btw)

Re: Flares?

Posted: Wed May 21, 2008 18:05
by jayen_aitch
Mmmm, but bootcuts are a step in the right direction.

I don't know that my father wore flares either... I think my mum did... and an afghan coat. Fint.

I think I look more chic than retro in my flares... though I'm not wearing them tonight.

Re: Flares?

Posted: Wed May 21, 2008 23:01
by grumpytimes
maybe i need to have an adventurous shop and flounce around fashion shops like i own the place.

or perhaps stop over thinking these things and be happy with my regular guy jeans....